People Problems

oil painting
18 by 24 inch Stretched Canvas
Started august 2022 - in progress

I'm question everything as I work through a painting.

Who do think I am?  

What is the difference between abstraction and representation?

When do I keep going?

Where does this painting fit?

Why not let charcoal marks show?

How does one painting generate so many questions and so few answers?

 

Alex
He's looking at a squirrel.
or a ghost.
Not sure there is much difference to him.

I am jealouse.  A cat can be curious.  There is no self doubt that I can see.  No worries about someone being threatened by asking questions.  

No questions, outside of when am I going to feed him.

oil painting
9 by 12 inch paper
untitled at this point

Sometimes, not often enough, I lose myself in a painting.  No doubts, no questions, just the feel of a brush, or knife, or papertowel, as they press against the canvas.  Reacting to some internal nudge.  Those days, I forget about isolation, demands on time and money, and just live.  

  

  

Control Freak? I think not.

Sketchbook entry

Drawing is relaxing; but, only if I dont think about what I am drawing.  

Not easy to do.   Try it someday.

I could not have done this drawing with a lot of planning.  In fact, I just put pencil on paper and let something emerge.

I have no idea if this is normal, or something unique to me.  

It would not surprise me if most artists were total control freaks and plan every detail out prior to placing a mark on paper.  I wouldn't understand how they could live with themselves; but, it would not surprise me.  

I have to force myself to draw from a still life set up in front of me; and, this is a necessary thing to do.  Drawing from life, or objects, does help sharpen drawing skills - not to mention training my eye to see what is actually there.   

Maybe, I should try planning out a drawing.